How to make use of challenging life situation


Most of us have had some kind of depressive experience. Losing a loved one, losing a job, money, burn-out, cancer, divorce, you name it: there are endless reasons for losing hope and faith or being depressed. Yet, if it lasts too long, it shows that we have not learned to cope with life situations and need support. Unfortunately, drugs can change the hormone system, possibly make you feel relieved, yet, you haven’t learned to address the original issue. So the pharmaceutical industry has a huge market there and doctors cooperate in the sickness business by subscribing drugs, often without offering a healing remedy such as therapy or coaching.

How does depression start?
Often in childhood, we have been educated to be nice and behave. Rage, anger, sadness etc. were pushed aside, only the fun stuff was appreciated: Joy. Some children develop a coping mechanism by not showing but swallowing negative emotions. It is very easy to push aside the negative stuff in order to see the good stuff only. Yet, this is not how a healthy human works: we do have to feel all these emotions. They are our guiding system. Then, we need to process emotions and make up our mind, how to deal with the situation. Otherwise, we either become depressed, resigned, and hopeless or we are victims of “destiny” or our ability to feel, digest and respond to a situation. Emotions are a guiding system, they are not there to let them drive our life without us making up our mind – I am talking about rage  or panic attacks etc.. Depression once might have served for not having to feel because you could not cope, yet, if this becomes a longterm state, we lose our capacity to create our lives, simply because we disconnect from our inherent guiding system: emotions. All emotions.

I recently had a coaching client who suffered from depression during 20 years. Nothing would help. Even the drugs and sleeping pills did not seem to work as before. I was her last hope. We did 3 Coaching sessions, worked on mental habits, emotional habits, diet, relaxation exercise and outdoor practices. Within that time, the client finally opened a window of hope and realized her own power in this process and that she was bigger than the part, kept her imprisoned in misery. That client has experienced that the tools how to deal with a situation are in her own hands and the only thing that keeps us from using them, is a sabotaging mindset. That sabotaging mindset had a good reason to be, once upon a time. Once, it was good for us to react in the way we did: shutting down. However, now, that habit is impregnated in the subconscious, it works without further permission. We now have to free us from an old pattern that is of no use. The tools are there. We have easy access. Yet, nobody can do the job for us, it is up to us to change our mindsets, habits, lives. No blaming, no excuses. Using those roots to make your wings fly.

Every dis-ease has a message that wants to be heard. Once released, the flow of life can continue effortlessly. Let’s remember who we are,  and live our purpose and potential! As long as we do not judge situations, we can make the very best out of them, first accept, deal with them and grow. I am grateful to be accompanying people during times of change with Coaching.

 

 


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