Ironically, the only constant in life is change. Knowing that, wouldn’t it make much sense to start loving and creating change? Many of us don’t like change, since it forces us out of our comfort zone into a space of the uncomfortable insecure unknown. Kind of scary. I have a theory: Change starts inside of you. It is your way of facing situations that make the difference in the outcome, not the outside circumstances. Do you see a half full or a half empty glass right there?? This is how I started to love change: I had two small children, was a successful business woman with a well-established publishing company, making good money. OK, I don’t remember how I did it all, and in fact, I was pretty much burnt out, running from home to work and back to make sure to get all my duties done. There was no time to just be, reflect or listen inside. The typical mouse wheel scenario. Then, visiting a dermatologist to remove a wart, I “accidentally” found out that some of those spots on my skin did not look good. I went to have them removed and waited 10 days for the lab results. Then, on day 12 I went back to the hospital, to get the results… “You have a skin melanoma clark level 4 of 5 and need to be re-operated immediately. Next week might me too late”. It took me another 30 minutes to wake up and get the message. I had totally ignored how serious the situation was. There was no remedy, if the freaking cancer had spread and built metastasis. My kids would grow up without a mother. Horrifying. I could not afford a single negative thought, or fear of ending life in the body next week but focus on my change in life after this experience. This experience was one of the most important impacts on my life and everything changed! First of all, I did not die, which was great!!! But most importantly, I started questioning what is, and realized that I did not live the life that was good for me. My job was meaningless, I saw my kids only in the evening for a little time, life was a crazy, running around, chasing goals while missing the moment. That cancer experience forced me to hold on, sit back and contemplate the whole story again. My survival instinct made me decide to reflect about what was really important to me and visualize how I wanted to live rather than on limitations and fears. After the operation and 5 years of screening upside down and inside out every 3 months, there were no metastasis and I was healthy and happy as can be. The change was big: I quit work and started training to become a coach. I was on fire, and absolutely loved what I did. I worked the hours I wanted, half day only and made the money we needed and even a little bit more. I had time to spend with the kids in the afternoons and evenings. We moved to beautiful Mallorca shortly after and started all over again to follow that dream to live on the seaside in a warmer climate. The super-scary cancer situation was a screaming wake-up call that turned out to become the biggest chance for change. I had learned to look at what is and see the potential. The point is, everybody can do that and it doesn’t take a cancer to start! Wouldn’t it be great to take every situation, “problem”, experience as a neutral one and look for the potential of change rather than focusing on negative aspects??? Let’s experiment! 1. Set a clear goal: to embrace change! Take every challenge as a potential for change and growth, choose new possibilities outside of your current comfort zone. 2. Apply the mindfulness strategy: Anticipate problems. Expect shit to happen, be aware that being alive is a movement, up, down, a play of black, white and the colors in between. So start to become very aware of every moment. Not only what happens around you, but especially how you react to it, your thoughts and feelings towards a new, challenging situation, without judging! Just look at it. 3. Become responsible rather that reactive. NOW you create change! Step back and do not react but look at the situation from a distance. OK, that requires a bit of training. Since we are animals of habit, an automized chain reaction seems to take over during trigger situations, negative thought and feelings appear automatically. However, whatever you observe, you just observe and gain distance rather than identify with the negativity. Investigate and look for a new potential, visualize a new interpretation, a new chance in this situation! You become the rider of the horse, rather than the victim of the situation and your habitual response. The more often you implement this strategy, the more you feel in charge of your life and realize your own responsibility is your power and your freedom. Conclusion: If you are tired of being frustrated, feeling low or angry at what is going on around you, then start embracing change now!!! Create new experiences inside of you and look for the potential rather than the limitation. Check for the very next opportunity when you face some kind of a negative situation to experiment this today or tomorrow! Start small: I visualize you sitting in the car in a traffic jam creating change: smile in your face, aware of the situation on responsible for your feelings and thoughts – choosing to enjoy the moment, haha. Give it a try and report! If you find this helpful in any way please LIKE! and SHARE with people who might benefit from the post! Thanx
Leave a Reply