The Subtle Art of not giving a F*ck

The subtle art of not giving a f*ck is an audio-book (available as book) by Mark Manson I recommend to my clients for the following reasons:

It is really funny to listen to
It inspires to question yourself
It makes you think about your values
It makes you stop criticising being the way you are
It makes you appreciate the insignificance and the individuality of yourself and others

Won´t tell more, so you enjoy yourself.

Why do we do what we do? And why are we often not quite happy with our choices?

Mark mentions the difference between “good values” and “bad values”. I would call them useful and useless values instead. Useful: in your own hands, doable, here and now. Useless: not in your power, outer values, depending on outer circumstances, don´t relate to the present.

Here is a list of values for you to pick your 3 or 4 most important values:

  • Authenticity
  • Achievement
  • Adventure
  • Authority
  • Autonomy
  • Balance
  • Beauty
  • Boldness
  • Compassion
  • Challenge
  • Citizenship
  • Community
  • Competency
  • Contribution
  • Creativity
  • Curiosity
  • Determination
  • Fairness
  • Faith
  • Fame
  • Friendships
  • Fun
  • Growth
  • Happiness
  • Honesty
  • Humor
  • Influence
  • Inner Harmony
  • Justice
  • Kindness
  • Knowledge
  • Leadership
  • Learning
  • Love
  • Loyalty
  • Meaningful Work
  • Openness
  • Optimism
  • Peace
  • Pleasure
  • Poise
  • Popularity
  • Recognition
  • Religion
  • Reputation
  • Respect
  • Responsibility
  • Security
  • Self-Respect
  • Service
  • Spirituality
  • Stability
  • Success
  • Status
  • Trustworthiness
  • Wealth
  • Wisdom

You can choose any other values instead. The most important factor here is to become aware of what is truly important to you. Then, you can focus on that value in any situation throughout the day and feel “on track”. Once you feel good about the way you act and interact, some part of your mind that used to criticise or resist what is, can relax.  You can use that free energy to focus on what you really want, instead of spoiling your precious attention on what´s wrong and therefor sticking to what´s wrong… ” it´s always the same”, “I can´t stand this anymore”, “if they only understood..”

This work requires leaving the “comfort zone”, the place you are used to.  Looking deeper can be painful at the beginning. Fears can come up that were suppressed by not looking deeper, before. Yet, the energy that is set free by releasing those ideas is vitalising and empowering.

It is very rewarding to accompany our clients during a One-week-Intensive at beautiful locations. Working in inspiring settings, away from habitual surroundings, work and family systems helps to aware of what is really going on inside yourself. No distractions. No projections. No excuses. This work is cleansing and healing, opening you up to a new realisation of yourself. You are no longer the picture you had of yourself before. But discovering your true essence and what you want to do with it.

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